thought 1

Right now I'm going through a pretty stressful period, and I have a lot to worry about.

"I am filled with worry today – a worry different from the ”normal” kind. This worry eats you from within, starting from the pit of your stomache, this hunger, this thirst, moves on, towards the lungs, pressing the body down, making you unable to breathe. Afterwards, it heads toward the heart, the absolute destination, and raving, biting, wrecking, it destroys and concurrs, and we succumb to it, under the great load of fear, we resign to this worry - the worst of all savages."

I wrote this not long ago. It's depressing isn't it? But I really feel this way - when I start worrying about something, I just can't stop, I end up thinking of the problem again and again. And it eats me up. It's all I can focus on.
I really do have an unbelievably great talent in wasting and shortening my life time (I eat a lot of salt).

A first!

This is a first. I don't know if I really have the guts to publish my thoughts and have them lying here in the open for anyone to read. I already feel naked. But this will be a good challenge for me.

My goal in life at the moment is to become a great author (earlier goals include: becoming a police officer, teacher designer, singer, painter, actor, etc). My problem: I have a hard time showing my work to people. Now i have a chance to overcome that fear! And I will be able to get critique on what I've written too! That's something I'm really looking forward to. So I'll just write down thoughts a little now and then. It'll be great practice and I'll get to know what people actually think of my style of writing. This way I'll know if I should continue pursueing the writing career or simply move on towards my next goal (dolphin trainer!!!).

I'm going for it!/ Ini :)